Imagine this problem...

and attempt to solve if you can~

Can 1141 times the square of a certain number, plus 1 aftwewards, and having all those taken a square root, be the perfect square of another number?

----> Answer in this blog if you wish lah~

the answer would be revealed later today

Firmly established in Stage 5 despite the mood of the song sounds like in Stage 4...

but then Stage 5 for me is digesting a different part of the lyrics of the same song.

Hmm~What exactly is the event that drives me into Stage 5?

Can't tell....just all those feelings..

and I know I would digest the first part of the song....

Suddenly find myself in Stage 5...
This is not related to anything else...

Just that I find myself receiving a boost in morale~

I am sure...and I know...
I will....

If:
Stage 1=My Immortal,
Stage 2=Adia,
Stage 3=Do What You Have to Do,
Stage 4=Dirty Little Secret.....

Then I'm in Stage 4 now...
But then...
How many stages would I have to undergo?
And where is the end of this tunnel?

One should not worry, but I did...
One should not feel the fear, but I did...
One should not feel too much, but apparently I did...

So many shouldn'ts, but then the shouldn'ts are not equivalent to what I have done...
Perhaps...
I know my way...
I feel myself in stage 4 as if what I felt during stage 1...
and of course stage 4 is much more difficult to stand because of its torments...
and that I am too awake about the feelings in Stage 4 because they were just the same of Stage 1,
but of course at a muich deeper degree....

Should I pace myself and proceed to Stage 5?
But what then Stage 5 would be?
And ultimately....

Where is the answer?

Hope the situation described in Dirty Little Secret is of a very short period...
I thrive on hope to keep me alive,
which I have to admit...for being unhealthy to a certain extent.

But then, without those hopes, what I should thrive to live for?

I would not say it's the most important thing of my life,
but still it occupies a certain degree of importance (which I appreciate why I am being so serious)...

I know I am now struggling at the edge of a cliff,
on the verge of falling,
I know that if I cannot hold my footsteps right and strong,
I would never be able to come out again.

I don't want this to happen,
as I can see from the examples of others,
that once fallen, it would fall perpetually, and this is what I don't want.

I just hope this is another stage of the transformation (or perhaps strengthening).
This stage is perhaps the more difficult and painful one to undergo when compared with the initial stage of confirming...
But as I have come such a long way, I won't let myself down....

Friends, appreciate the fact that I am the weakest at this time...
Please give me a direction, and lead me through.

Dirty Little Secret - Sarah McLachlan

If I had the chance love
I would not hesitate
To tell you all things I never said before
Don't tell me it's too late
Cause I've relied on my illusion
to keep me warm at night
and I've denied in my capacity to love
but I am willing to give up this fight

Been up all night drinking to drown my sorrows down
But nothing seems to help me since you've gone away
I'm so tired of this town where every tongue is wagging
When every back is turned
They're telling secrets that should never be revealed
There's nothing to be gained from this but disaster

Here's a good one
Did you hear about my friend
He's embarrassed to be seen now
Cause we all know his sins

If I had the chance love
I would not hesitate
To tell you all things I never said before
Don't tell me it's too late
Cause I've relied on my illusion
to keep me warm at night
and I've denied in my capacity to love
But I am willing to give up this fight
Oh I am willing to give up this fight

******************************************************
******************************************************

Never cry...
but then so many things come up to my mind...
and find my mind in peace....
Probably this is the song for me after "Do what you have to do"....

friends, help me, and pray for me...
wish me be fine....

今日堂Election tutorial都唔太特別...

最驚只係因為最後一個present會係我做，

我唔單止未睇完啲嘢，仲要連個present topic係乜所唔知....

真係死..更恐怖當然係Yuki話已經做完條essay嘅first draft...

嘩...大佬，好驚呀....

Contruct lecture...無嘢想講....

最得意係meet Jonathan for tea after all those lessons today...

Jonathan係我啱啱識的一個朋友...係呀Biii~介紹我識....

最初淨係知道佢好得意...

but now I know it's much more than this....he's witty

Jonathan, 我同ayaya去左一間幾靚的鋪頭食左個high-tea，

the experience is extremely nice...and I just love it~

傾到好多嘢....亦都了解多咗，

當然，某啲人落嚟之前灰，跟你俾人寸吓寸吓之後，

竟然覺得幸福......果個人唔該記得，你而家真係好幸福ga~

邊似得其他人咁灰呀.....

一個月咋嘛....好舒服咁等喇....

做人開心啲好，especially this is an original quote from one L..

Jon,

perhaps we should study together, and I really look forward to the night that we spend outside and talk....

and please don't miss MillMill for this...I really love to see her~

琴日去做台證，

點知原來香港出生的人，

係可以去到台灣做落地簽證，

即係免簽證喇.....

太好喇.....

連個trip最基本的野都唔駛煩.....真係好。

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

左仔....

這班討人厭的左仔.....

真係鬼唔望你死快啲....

唔怪得Tina話樓下有人遊行喇....

唔知tim....

詳情見蘋果日報報導

個性
你有很好的平衡感，偏重邏輯式的思考方式。在想要某東西之前，都會冷靜的判斷自己的經濟能力。你不會勉強的貸一筆鉅款去買房子。你是一個在心智上完全臻於成熟的人。每天精神奕奕、充滿自信，同時又很受到朋 友們的信賴。但是相對地，你對日常生活乃至人生的態度稍嫌嚴肅了一點。或許是因為 你給別人的印象就是如此，而你也刻意地去表現出這一面。不過，如果你能更加任性點 ，偶而輕鬆一下，不要固執地想要一直去扮演完人的角色。說不定反而能提高你的聲望也說不定。 你是那種吵架吵完就忘的類型。無論吵得再凶，對方說得多難聽 ，睡了一覺之後，你都好像沒發生過一樣地能和對方繼續相處。這樣的態度，反倒是讓對方自己覺得慚愧，而能順利地言歸於好。你是個很浪漫的人，生活態度也像夢般的虛幻。對錢很不在意，只有在感覺錢是很重要的時候，才會加以儲蓄。對金錢的運用漫不經心，常會丟掉錢包，借給別人的錢也常常會忘記。由於你浪漫的個性，所以不要等到要救急時才存錢，更要有計畫的管理錢財，這樣對你才會有幫助。表面上看起來，你好像是一個很好說話的人，其實最最固執的人，就是你了，一旦發起牛脾氣來，任誰也拗不過你，因為在你的內心是封閉和害羞，冷漠就是你用來掩飾害怕和人群接觸的自然反應！你是個講理的人，希望能好聲好氣與別人商量事情，基本上，你彬彬有禮的態度，通常都可以與人為善。但這世界上還是會有一些說不通道理的惡霸，這時候，你也不會被嚇得退縮，你會去找合乎法律程序的途徑來解決問題，讓人家輸得心服口服，你的柔性兼具理性的策略，總是可以奏效。你是心地非常善良的人，但與人相處時為了不想暴露自己的缺點而設了一道防線，所以有時會被人誤會為不容易親近之人，雖然朋友不多，但能擁有深厚友誼。再者有優秀的數字能力，能在理工上一展長才。你這種類型的人,是經歷過各種的苦難.悠煩而建立屬於自己的人生觀,是越挫越勇的人再與人交往方面算是相當順利的,因大多會站在對方的立場體諒別人,很容易受他人的信賴與親近,朋友都喜歡找你傾訴心中的煩惱。還有，你脾氣變化無常，有興趣時，能認真踏實做下去，一旦失去興趣，就會對所做的事感到莫明其妙，予以放棄。

愛情
你的感情表現常常是勇敢、開明、自由的，因為你非常的坦然，因此從來不喜歡猜忌或懷疑別人對你的態度和心意。你對人有很好的包容力，如果遇到實在不喜歡的人，採取態度是迴避，不會直接衝突。暗戀是你最拿手的戀愛方式!永遠只在遠遠的地方看著心儀的人,幻想著有一天他會主動來約你.愛他就要勇敢說出來!加油唷。先天上你就是一個會掌控戀情的人，不管是怎樣的戀情，一但讓你遇上了，你都能順利地照著自己的意思運作；而且你非常地瞭解異性的心理，知道什麼時候該撒嬌、什麼時候該使性子，這也正是你的魅力所在，所以對方很快地就會被你吸引。只站在遠處觀看，是不會為自己帶來任何機會的。但是，也許有第三者會被你那謹慎的態度所吸引，這時，即使那個人長得不帥，仍然會使你被他的真誠所感動。有智慧、沉靜、三思後行，尊重人，有修養的個性，是你之所以喜歡他的原因。一旦與他認識，你會希望與他共處一生。你的個性比較沈靜，可是你卻喜歡上陽光、活潑，甚至做事有點傻勁的異性，你們之間像是互補的組合，讓人充滿了甜蜜和期待的感覺。你外表看起來像是溫馴的小綿羊，不會做出傷人的事，但相處一久，就可以發現，在你純潔的羊皮之下，是一顆熾熱的心。因為你這樣愛到深處無怨尤的性格，才會那麼在乎對方，時刻都想黏在一起，是屬於隱性透明的強力膠。你會因愛人的言行舉止，而產生許多迷惑，你不能肯定他是否真心愛你，也不知道愛情會延續多久，所以你時常為了這個問題而煩惱不安，其實你不必這麼懷疑對方，應該以信心和誠意來對待他，才能共創永恆的愛情。你是穩紮穩打型的人，雖然你對於婚前的性行為，不會採反對的態度，但是你一定會再三確定對方的心意，才肯去付出，雖然你對失去對方，不會有太過激烈的想法，但是只要曾經是屬於你的，你就會一直堅持下去，不會輕易變心！你給異性的感覺是個喜歡交朋友的人，所以跟你較相近的對象也應該是個悠然自得、懂得享受愛情的人。你們兩人很可能成為令人近羨的鴛鴦夫妻。這種注意格調的人，多半都是注意外表的人。你是否會認為沒戀人是件很沒面子的事呢??而當你到他家作客時，由你所在意的事情便可以看出你是否真的喜歡他。你的醋勁不算太大，但是偶爾會疾火中燒，不過不是很強烈，不過忍耐太久 就會有爆發的可能。

事業
你的心智成熟度嚴格上來說還沒有真的成熟，ＥＱ比較差，常常陰晴不定的表情就會掛在臉上，做事好像也是「隨性而為」，老大不高興就擺張「憂鬱」的臉呆在那，如果有人在這時請他做事，就好像是你的不對一樣。你可說是頭號野心份子，對事業雄心勃勃，表面上看來是個好相處的人可是從進一公司那天起，無不處心積慮想要向上爬，力求個人表現，努力做功夫，爭取權力高層的注意。

人際關係
無論遇到甚麼人，你也會真誠相對，實話實說，可謂有點天真爛漫。不過，在某些場合上，卻因過份的毫無保留而令對方感到尷尬。因為 性格率直無機心，所以很受朋友歡迎。為了顯示實力，也會向別人提供不少八卦秘聞，總之有你出現的地方，就絕不會有沉悶場面。工作上，率直的性格令你成 為上司的好助手。你善守中庸之道，希望和朋友的交往是有節有度，不會太過親膩，也不會太疏遠。因為你是很實際在考量和朋友之間的分際，一般而言，朋友是很有用處的，俗語說出外靠朋友嘛，可是你又覺得有時聽多了負面的例子，也有可能被朋友陷害利用，還是要謹慎小心，別被人家當成無辜的肥羊痛宰。你對於朋友的懷舊度似乎不高，有時候你應該好好珍惜和朋友的友誼。

from this place

Friends, do you this is the one guy that you find in me? Leave me comments to tell me lah~ I beg you lah~

由衷對朋友的一句多謝，

由衷對正下莊的一句對不起。

Tina,

我這句對不起幫不了甚麼，

也不會大大改變他們對你的態度，

我期望的是你能原諒我犯過的錯，

更期望是這是一股著我改變一點的動力，

因為有人是因著我而對你不好，

他們教人討厭，但我不會跟他們一起教人討厭，

希望我可以有力量去做好這事。